It's been a while.

I've been really unfaithful with my blog. I just find enough time in my day to do what I need to and then what I don't need to on facebook, check my hotmail and then before I know it, Trent's naptime is over and the laundry is still staring at me.

So here it is 1:30 in the am and I'm still up! I don't feel well, but can't sleep and didnt' want to keep Brettly up while I toss and turn.

I'm sad that the Kids Zumba summer session 2 is over. The kids are such a bright spot in my week! One little boy so innocently tugged on my pants and when I kneeled down, he wiped my sweaty hair out of my face and held my face in his hands. It reminded me of when the Lost Boys (in "HOOK") were checkin' out Peter Pan and then one little boy pulled at his face and cupped his chin. After this little guy held my face he gave me a kiss on the cheek and said thanks. It was so sweet! I'll definitely have to do another session in the fall when I get back from the Zumba conference. I'll then be officially certified in ZUMBATOMIC (Kids Zumba) and hopefully have much more to offer the little zumbies!

I've been accepted to the Masters in Professional (Christian) Counseling program at Liberty University and start taking classes on Sept. 21st.

I have only told a hand-full of people about this and I think it's mostly because I can't believe it's actually happening! I had so many plans and ideas about how this was going to work and then it didn't. So I guess I finally let my grip on my life plan loosen up and this is just amazing to me how God is working. He's reminded me, through a LOVELY and UNEXPECTED gal, that I love to listen, apply scripture, pray and help. This has definitely been welcomed refreshment in my hectic life. I guess, too, I feel like I don't deserve for this to work out. I haven't done anything recently to be more Godly or to pursue this path other than apply...and even saying that I feel like I'm exposing myself. And I worry that others will think the same, that I don't deserve this and what kind of counsel could I possibly give to anyone b/c I'm a wreck. Satan is such a good liar whether or not people chose to be vehicles for those lies.

"In everything give thanks" and I'm pretty sure there something that mentions avoiding foolish talk. So, I give thanks. Sure I don't deserve this life. Jesus gave it to me and I'm grateful. Without him, I'm nothing. Without him, I'm dead. WITH him, I can be alive. Alive in my profession, alive as a wife, alive as a mother and free to be GRATEFUL for all that I have in Jesus.

Amen (and as my dear friend Debby says) "and Amen"

Why can't we just love?

Sometimes, it seems that the more years I add to my new life in Christ the more easy it becomes to get caught up in Christianity than to be caught up in Jesus.

Breaking down what people say by whether or not they are biblically sound instead of just LISTENING to them and loving them is a habit that comes to mind. Or analyzing someone else's sin instead of seeing them the way God does is another bad tendency.

The saddest part about my quest to be more "Christian" is that I get trapped between trying to get it right and feeling guilty because I don't. And ultimately, it seperates me from others and sabotages exactly what God's desire is for my life...to be in relationship. The worst is when I sacrafice my relationship with God to chase Christianity and religion.

It's all about

Relationship! I'm reading The Shack and in fact am driving my husband mad because I read it before bed when he's ready to tuck in for the night.

Now that I'm 'getting' it I can't put it down. There was a turning point for me with the book where I started to really connect to Mack the main character. I am now beginning to see some of the HUGE truths that are packed into this not-so-long paperback book.

The number one truth I'm meditating on now is relationship. God wants to be in relationship with us. God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit want to be as close to me as I'll allow them to be. And even more, God is "especially fond" of lots of people and I should be, too. It's encouraging me to be available for other people in conversation and time. I definitely am glad to be reminded of the need for good listeners in this world where there are so many who are hurting.

If you get the chance, check it out. The Shack by William P. Young

Shew!

What a blogging break it has been. It seems that blogging, like everything else, is easier to "keep up with" than to start or restart.

It feels like not a lot is going on while so much is going on all at once. Regardless things are going well and I'm joyful! Here's a pic to share some of my joy with you!

Blogging Break!

When our computer at home is fixed I'll be blogging again...I miss it!!!

i just wanted to say how wonderful it was today when i commited to God the plans/desires of my heart how he took care of everything. sometimes it's hard to remember that God is and should be the reason why i do what i do. i'm glad he teaches and reteaches me these things all the time!

hard drive

today i tried to turn on the computer and was really concerned i had done something bad yesterday when trying to create more storage space. it wouldn't start. it wouldn't move past the black screen with a LOT of initials and symbols i didn't understand.

i called the IT guy at WVU b/c they know the computer best and he guided me through troubleshooting the problem. "hit F12, read the screen, look for HD, turn it off, flip it over, on the bottom left there should be your hard drive, wiggle it a little and firmly secure it in its spot."

the screw holding the hard drive in is MISSING!

it reminded me of my faith. i can't even power up if my hard drive is loose. what or WHO is my hard drive? is it me? or is God located at the center of my heart? in order to function properly it is CRITICAL for God to have his right place in my heart. i can claim verses like "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." but if the screw is missing, if my fellowship with God is non-existent, then i'm not powered by him, i'm powered by me. God can be present in my heart and mind, but just like the hard drive if he is not directly secured in the proper position as KING and FATHER to be Lord of my heart then I WON'T WORK!!!! and then i'm left to wonder, "what did i do to screw it up? why isn't this LIFE working for me?!" fortunately, like the IT guy, there are seasoned believers at my fingertips who can help guide me to the One that makes it all work. they help me put the screw back in, reconnect with God and begin to feel the joy of living for God.