The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children (NIV, Rom. 8:16).
This morning Trent reminded me that we are God's children. As I watched Trent reorganize our cabinets I smiled. He did things the hard way, dropped stuff, got frustrated, but kept at it and the end result was a stuffed, messy cabinet.
We still clapped and cheered when he was done because he's learning to put things back where they belong and that should be celebrated! It was humbling to think this is how God sees a lot of my attempts to "reorganize" or refocus my life. I drop stuff, forget stuff, hurt others, cram as much in as possible and I imagine God with his hand over his face watching through the cracks of his fingers as I fumble around trying to make things right. And like Trent's, the end result is more messy than when I started!
If I, God's child, just spent more time with Him, I bet he'd show me all I need to know about the order of my life.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
However...
BUT, we can work to change and overcome that set-point. But it takes hard work. I'd like to think I'm in the midst of hard work and soon my set-point will change.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
homeostasis
I think that much like our physical beings, our mental, spiritual and emotional beings have a set-point. A homeostasis if you will. We are comfortable at certain levels regardless of how healthy or unhealthy this place of being may be. And we will, like our bodies, fight to stay there.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Work
Today I received an encouraging email from a friend who reminded me that it's constant work to juggle everything. I'm grateful she used the word "work."
Sometimes I often think "It's a struggle to juggle!" That could be a really pathetic rap song for Moms. But I wouldn't want to produce it because the lyrics sound not only ridiculous and cheesy, but also cumbersome. I like the thought of work. I like the reward of hard work. And I think there is hope in growth that is produced through work.
Well, that's all for now. Night night!
Sometimes I often think "It's a struggle to juggle!" That could be a really pathetic rap song for Moms. But I wouldn't want to produce it because the lyrics sound not only ridiculous and cheesy, but also cumbersome. I like the thought of work. I like the reward of hard work. And I think there is hope in growth that is produced through work.
Well, that's all for now. Night night!
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Dramatic!
I guess Jonah had a flare for the dramatic! I mean, in Chapter 4 he actually told God he "angry enough to die." Not angry at an unrepentent people, not angry at sin. Jonah was angry at God's compassion and then that anger was compounded by a vine that God gave and took away.
It seems like such a limited perspective that Jonah has there at the end of the book but I can relate. When I pray and things don't go the way I thought they should I get upset, angry and hurt.
On Sunday my brother Casey, for the first time in years, went to church with us WILLINGLY. I was so excited that he might experience a bit of God's love and be moved to accept God's gift of grace and eternal life that I wasn't prepared for what was going to happen.
Casey endured the service uncomfortable all the while. And at the end with tears in his eyes he looked at me with a soft heart. My eyes teared up a bit, too. Whether his tears were from joy or pain, I didn't know. I just told him I loved him.
Without all of the details, something stirred Casey's heart and spirit. Was it the Holy Spirit knocking at the door of his heart? I don't know. But when I felt hurt by Casey's words in the car my heart's response was much like Jonah's. I was limited in my perspective and did not understand what had happened. I still don't. But what I do know is that God has a plan. I know a little of what Jonah was feeling when God said to him, "You have been concerned for this vine, but you did not tend it or make it grow."
My job is now what it was before. To love Casey, stand firm in God's word and truth and pray for Casey to feel that love and accept the salvation God's trying to give him.
It seems like such a limited perspective that Jonah has there at the end of the book but I can relate. When I pray and things don't go the way I thought they should I get upset, angry and hurt.
On Sunday my brother Casey, for the first time in years, went to church with us WILLINGLY. I was so excited that he might experience a bit of God's love and be moved to accept God's gift of grace and eternal life that I wasn't prepared for what was going to happen.
Casey endured the service uncomfortable all the while. And at the end with tears in his eyes he looked at me with a soft heart. My eyes teared up a bit, too. Whether his tears were from joy or pain, I didn't know. I just told him I loved him.
Without all of the details, something stirred Casey's heart and spirit. Was it the Holy Spirit knocking at the door of his heart? I don't know. But when I felt hurt by Casey's words in the car my heart's response was much like Jonah's. I was limited in my perspective and did not understand what had happened. I still don't. But what I do know is that God has a plan. I know a little of what Jonah was feeling when God said to him, "You have been concerned for this vine, but you did not tend it or make it grow."
My job is now what it was before. To love Casey, stand firm in God's word and truth and pray for Casey to feel that love and accept the salvation God's trying to give him.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Just another day.
Today feels like just another day that is going to kick my butt! Sorry for the pesimism!
I've just struggled to get things done around the house and be as efficient as I would like. I'm going to detox from facebook for a while and I think that will help me stay focused on what needs to get done. The TV has been off for almost a month now and that has certainly helped me be more effective in my home but I still am struggling to just get things done.
Maybe today will be different but if not...what do I do?! How do I break this getting nowhere fast habit? Other Mommies please chime in and I'll let you know tomorrow if I was able to manage things any better!
I've just struggled to get things done around the house and be as efficient as I would like. I'm going to detox from facebook for a while and I think that will help me stay focused on what needs to get done. The TV has been off for almost a month now and that has certainly helped me be more effective in my home but I still am struggling to just get things done.
Maybe today will be different but if not...what do I do?! How do I break this getting nowhere fast habit? Other Mommies please chime in and I'll let you know tomorrow if I was able to manage things any better!
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Jonah!
Brett and I read Jonah chapter 1 together last night and a few things caught our attention. One, Jonah ran from God. A prophet, whose job it was to be sensitive to God and had the understanding of consequences when and if you were disobedient, RAN from God. And two, the struggles and ultimately the repentence that Jonah experienced literally turned him around (via the giant fish) and headed him back toward Nineveh to do what God had called him to do in the first place.
What a picture of God's grace in light of such blatent disobedience. In chapter two I read Jonah's prayer and realize there are some key words there that Jonah uses. He talks about not experience God's grace because of our attention and devotion to other idols. What idols do I have in my life that keep me from knowing and feeling the grace of God? He also says that Salvation comes from the Lord. So in times of confusion, fear and frustration I'm going to remember these two things: I could be robbing myself of the grace of God by putting other idols first and that salvation only comes from the Lord. I can't save myself.
What a picture of God's grace in light of such blatent disobedience. In chapter two I read Jonah's prayer and realize there are some key words there that Jonah uses. He talks about not experience God's grace because of our attention and devotion to other idols. What idols do I have in my life that keep me from knowing and feeling the grace of God? He also says that Salvation comes from the Lord. So in times of confusion, fear and frustration I'm going to remember these two things: I could be robbing myself of the grace of God by putting other idols first and that salvation only comes from the Lord. I can't save myself.
Monday, August 17, 2009
On my way...
Into another week! I feel good about our new church membership at Harvest Pointe Community Church and am feeling super blessed God has led us there.
I pray my heart will be soft this week to God and all he is trying to reveal to me about myself and the world around me. I pray that Brett, Trent and I will be the love that was so freely given to us.
I pray my heart will be soft this week to God and all he is trying to reveal to me about myself and the world around me. I pray that Brett, Trent and I will be the love that was so freely given to us.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
It's been a while.
I've been really unfaithful with my blog. I just find enough time in my day to do what I need to and then what I don't need to on facebook, check my hotmail and then before I know it, Trent's naptime is over and the laundry is still staring at me.
So here it is 1:30 in the am and I'm still up! I don't feel well, but can't sleep and didnt' want to keep Brettly up while I toss and turn.
I'm sad that the Kids Zumba summer session 2 is over. The kids are such a bright spot in my week! One little boy so innocently tugged on my pants and when I kneeled down, he wiped my sweaty hair out of my face and held my face in his hands. It reminded me of when the Lost Boys (in "HOOK") were checkin' out Peter Pan and then one little boy pulled at his face and cupped his chin. After this little guy held my face he gave me a kiss on the cheek and said thanks. It was so sweet! I'll definitely have to do another session in the fall when I get back from the Zumba conference. I'll then be officially certified in ZUMBATOMIC (Kids Zumba) and hopefully have much more to offer the little zumbies!
I've been accepted to the Masters in Professional (Christian) Counseling program at Liberty University and start taking classes on Sept. 21st.
I have only told a hand-full of people about this and I think it's mostly because I can't believe it's actually happening! I had so many plans and ideas about how this was going to work and then it didn't. So I guess I finally let my grip on my life plan loosen up and this is just amazing to me how God is working. He's reminded me, through a LOVELY and UNEXPECTED gal, that I love to listen, apply scripture, pray and help. This has definitely been welcomed refreshment in my hectic life. I guess, too, I feel like I don't deserve for this to work out. I haven't done anything recently to be more Godly or to pursue this path other than apply...and even saying that I feel like I'm exposing myself. And I worry that others will think the same, that I don't deserve this and what kind of counsel could I possibly give to anyone b/c I'm a wreck. Satan is such a good liar whether or not people chose to be vehicles for those lies.
"In everything give thanks" and I'm pretty sure there something that mentions avoiding foolish talk. So, I give thanks. Sure I don't deserve this life. Jesus gave it to me and I'm grateful. Without him, I'm nothing. Without him, I'm dead. WITH him, I can be alive. Alive in my profession, alive as a wife, alive as a mother and free to be GRATEFUL for all that I have in Jesus.
Amen (and as my dear friend Debby says) "and Amen"
So here it is 1:30 in the am and I'm still up! I don't feel well, but can't sleep and didnt' want to keep Brettly up while I toss and turn.
I'm sad that the Kids Zumba summer session 2 is over. The kids are such a bright spot in my week! One little boy so innocently tugged on my pants and when I kneeled down, he wiped my sweaty hair out of my face and held my face in his hands. It reminded me of when the Lost Boys (in "HOOK") were checkin' out Peter Pan and then one little boy pulled at his face and cupped his chin. After this little guy held my face he gave me a kiss on the cheek and said thanks. It was so sweet! I'll definitely have to do another session in the fall when I get back from the Zumba conference. I'll then be officially certified in ZUMBATOMIC (Kids Zumba) and hopefully have much more to offer the little zumbies!
I've been accepted to the Masters in Professional (Christian) Counseling program at Liberty University and start taking classes on Sept. 21st.
I have only told a hand-full of people about this and I think it's mostly because I can't believe it's actually happening! I had so many plans and ideas about how this was going to work and then it didn't. So I guess I finally let my grip on my life plan loosen up and this is just amazing to me how God is working. He's reminded me, through a LOVELY and UNEXPECTED gal, that I love to listen, apply scripture, pray and help. This has definitely been welcomed refreshment in my hectic life. I guess, too, I feel like I don't deserve for this to work out. I haven't done anything recently to be more Godly or to pursue this path other than apply...and even saying that I feel like I'm exposing myself. And I worry that others will think the same, that I don't deserve this and what kind of counsel could I possibly give to anyone b/c I'm a wreck. Satan is such a good liar whether or not people chose to be vehicles for those lies.
"In everything give thanks" and I'm pretty sure there something that mentions avoiding foolish talk. So, I give thanks. Sure I don't deserve this life. Jesus gave it to me and I'm grateful. Without him, I'm nothing. Without him, I'm dead. WITH him, I can be alive. Alive in my profession, alive as a wife, alive as a mother and free to be GRATEFUL for all that I have in Jesus.
Amen (and as my dear friend Debby says) "and Amen"
Friday, May 22, 2009
Why can't we just love?
Sometimes, it seems that the more years I add to my new life in Christ the more easy it becomes to get caught up in Christianity than to be caught up in Jesus.
Breaking down what people say by whether or not they are biblically sound instead of just LISTENING to them and loving them is a habit that comes to mind. Or analyzing someone else's sin instead of seeing them the way God does is another bad tendency.
The saddest part about my quest to be more "Christian" is that I get trapped between trying to get it right and feeling guilty because I don't. And ultimately, it seperates me from others and sabotages exactly what God's desire is for my life...to be in relationship. The worst is when I sacrafice my relationship with God to chase Christianity and religion.
Breaking down what people say by whether or not they are biblically sound instead of just LISTENING to them and loving them is a habit that comes to mind. Or analyzing someone else's sin instead of seeing them the way God does is another bad tendency.
The saddest part about my quest to be more "Christian" is that I get trapped between trying to get it right and feeling guilty because I don't. And ultimately, it seperates me from others and sabotages exactly what God's desire is for my life...to be in relationship. The worst is when I sacrafice my relationship with God to chase Christianity and religion.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
It's all about
Relationship! I'm reading The Shack and in fact am driving my husband mad because I read it before bed when he's ready to tuck in for the night.
Now that I'm 'getting' it I can't put it down. There was a turning point for me with the book where I started to really connect to Mack the main character. I am now beginning to see some of the HUGE truths that are packed into this not-so-long paperback book.
The number one truth I'm meditating on now is relationship. God wants to be in relationship with us. God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit want to be as close to me as I'll allow them to be. And even more, God is "especially fond" of lots of people and I should be, too. It's encouraging me to be available for other people in conversation and time. I definitely am glad to be reminded of the need for good listeners in this world where there are so many who are hurting.
If you get the chance, check it out. The Shack by William P. Young
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Shew!
What a blogging break it has been. It seems that blogging, like everything else, is easier to "keep up with" than to start or restart.
It feels like not a lot is going on while so much is going on all at once. Regardless things are going well and I'm joyful! Here's a pic to share some of my joy with you!
It feels like not a lot is going on while so much is going on all at once. Regardless things are going well and I'm joyful! Here's a pic to share some of my joy with you!
Monday, March 23, 2009
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
hard drive
today i tried to turn on the computer and was really concerned i had done something bad yesterday when trying to create more storage space. it wouldn't start. it wouldn't move past the black screen with a LOT of initials and symbols i didn't understand.
i called the IT guy at WVU b/c they know the computer best and he guided me through troubleshooting the problem. "hit F12, read the screen, look for HD, turn it off, flip it over, on the bottom left there should be your hard drive, wiggle it a little and firmly secure it in its spot."
the screw holding the hard drive in is MISSING!
it reminded me of my faith. i can't even power up if my hard drive is loose. what or WHO is my hard drive? is it me? or is God located at the center of my heart? in order to function properly it is CRITICAL for God to have his right place in my heart. i can claim verses like "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." but if the screw is missing, if my fellowship with God is non-existent, then i'm not powered by him, i'm powered by me. God can be present in my heart and mind, but just like the hard drive if he is not directly secured in the proper position as KING and FATHER to be Lord of my heart then I WON'T WORK!!!! and then i'm left to wonder, "what did i do to screw it up? why isn't this LIFE working for me?!" fortunately, like the IT guy, there are seasoned believers at my fingertips who can help guide me to the One that makes it all work. they help me put the screw back in, reconnect with God and begin to feel the joy of living for God.
i called the IT guy at WVU b/c they know the computer best and he guided me through troubleshooting the problem. "hit F12, read the screen, look for HD, turn it off, flip it over, on the bottom left there should be your hard drive, wiggle it a little and firmly secure it in its spot."
the screw holding the hard drive in is MISSING!
it reminded me of my faith. i can't even power up if my hard drive is loose. what or WHO is my hard drive? is it me? or is God located at the center of my heart? in order to function properly it is CRITICAL for God to have his right place in my heart. i can claim verses like "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." but if the screw is missing, if my fellowship with God is non-existent, then i'm not powered by him, i'm powered by me. God can be present in my heart and mind, but just like the hard drive if he is not directly secured in the proper position as KING and FATHER to be Lord of my heart then I WON'T WORK!!!! and then i'm left to wonder, "what did i do to screw it up? why isn't this LIFE working for me?!" fortunately, like the IT guy, there are seasoned believers at my fingertips who can help guide me to the One that makes it all work. they help me put the screw back in, reconnect with God and begin to feel the joy of living for God.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
repentence
The more I grow the more I learn repentence is necessary and beautiful. Sometimes it's emotionally taxing and sometimes it's just the right response to my sin. No matter how I experience repentence the outcome is always the same: a clean slate with God and a new beginning in Christ.
After my last blog I confessed my sins to Brett and asked him to hold my hand and pray with me. I wasn't asking Brett to repent for me, I just needed accountibility in my repentence. I knew that there was a lot of emotional build up that was waiting to come out and I needed support as I sought out God's grace.
Now I realize that if I'm faithful to clean my slate with God often it's a lot less emotionally taxing and a lot easier to refocus on the life God has for me to live.
Stacy Santon once said it's like cereal in a bowl. If you don't rinse your bowl out right away the cereal can get really hard and becomes more and more difficult to clean. So if I immediately repent, my heart doesn't get quite as hard and I can enjoy more of your time with God, instead of running from what the Holy Spirit is calling me to do.
After my last blog I confessed my sins to Brett and asked him to hold my hand and pray with me. I wasn't asking Brett to repent for me, I just needed accountibility in my repentence. I knew that there was a lot of emotional build up that was waiting to come out and I needed support as I sought out God's grace.
Now I realize that if I'm faithful to clean my slate with God often it's a lot less emotionally taxing and a lot easier to refocus on the life God has for me to live.
Stacy Santon once said it's like cereal in a bowl. If you don't rinse your bowl out right away the cereal can get really hard and becomes more and more difficult to clean. So if I immediately repent, my heart doesn't get quite as hard and I can enjoy more of your time with God, instead of running from what the Holy Spirit is calling me to do.
Friday, January 9, 2009
i hesitate to blog some days b/c it does occur to me that other people read it and what i want to express or write about might startle others, offend others or worse yet...reveal some of the ugliness that is in my heart, mind and life.
i guess things i think or do in the quiet spots of life aren't that bad, but they are rough enough that i hesitate to expose them to anyone! like, i'm embarassed to be honest about the same struggle, again and again. i hate admitting that i fight laziness and overeating on a daily basis. worse yet, i hate admitting that lately eight times out of ten i lose those battles. ireally want those areas of my life to be purified so that i can flippin glorify God. and sometimes, i really strive hard to listen for the Holy Spirit as my conscience, and other times i'll smother it with sleep, TV, chips and dip or some fried something that i stuff down my throat. then comes the guilt. the guilt, the condemnation, mood swings and hopefully repentence. but i guess that is the WORST part, sometimes i forget to repent. or i feel SOOOOO guilty that i hate to admit that i need or should have the sweet release of repentence and grace. i feel like i should exist in muck as my punishment for disobedience. or i try to fix it myself. i've tried bullemia for my overeating. i've had super diets written for me and i've exercised. i've made checklist to redirect my actions and relied on the since of accomplishment to move past my shortcomings.
but the problems are still there. i never grew from them and so i still battled with them no more equipped than when i first was introduced to the temptation.
this ugly, hideous cycle has me right now and i have got to give it up. but here's the thing. this isn't the last time i'm going to be tested in these areas of my life and if i fail, then i have to repent again and it just hurts.
but what i need to remember that if i don't do the "about face" then i'm going to have this residual yuckiness in my heart just weighing down my spirit.
tonight i will repent. tomorrow, i get to start new. thank God for all he has done and just by releasing the way i feel about the situation on this blog has helped me see what i need to do.
i guess things i think or do in the quiet spots of life aren't that bad, but they are rough enough that i hesitate to expose them to anyone! like, i'm embarassed to be honest about the same struggle, again and again. i hate admitting that i fight laziness and overeating on a daily basis. worse yet, i hate admitting that lately eight times out of ten i lose those battles. ireally want those areas of my life to be purified so that i can flippin glorify God. and sometimes, i really strive hard to listen for the Holy Spirit as my conscience, and other times i'll smother it with sleep, TV, chips and dip or some fried something that i stuff down my throat. then comes the guilt. the guilt, the condemnation, mood swings and hopefully repentence. but i guess that is the WORST part, sometimes i forget to repent. or i feel SOOOOO guilty that i hate to admit that i need or should have the sweet release of repentence and grace. i feel like i should exist in muck as my punishment for disobedience. or i try to fix it myself. i've tried bullemia for my overeating. i've had super diets written for me and i've exercised. i've made checklist to redirect my actions and relied on the since of accomplishment to move past my shortcomings.
but the problems are still there. i never grew from them and so i still battled with them no more equipped than when i first was introduced to the temptation.
this ugly, hideous cycle has me right now and i have got to give it up. but here's the thing. this isn't the last time i'm going to be tested in these areas of my life and if i fail, then i have to repent again and it just hurts.
but what i need to remember that if i don't do the "about face" then i'm going to have this residual yuckiness in my heart just weighing down my spirit.
tonight i will repent. tomorrow, i get to start new. thank God for all he has done and just by releasing the way i feel about the situation on this blog has helped me see what i need to do.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Not sure yet.
Man, I'm not gonna lie! I am tired! At least my eyes are tired. Every time I use my eye makeup remover it makes my eyelids feel heavy and it's funny that I didn't notice this a minute ago when I was checking my facebook profile and now that I'm attempting to read scripture I just can't keep them open!
I'm not sure why I've stopped at the passage below. Perhaps because I'm a little sleepy and need something strong to jog my mind and stir my heart. I'm not reading it from the perspective of a feminist, and I certainly am not using a patriarchal lense of understanding. But now that I've said that, God is my father. So what would be wrong with a patrairchal view? If it's a Godly view then it's right. I guess what I'm getting at is that I'm going to have to read some more about this scripture. In the meantime, I know that I'm not suppose to get in the way of the truth as a woman and as a follower of Christ. I'll gather more later and let it marinate for now.
1 Timothy 2:9-15
9I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, 10but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.
11A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. 12I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. 13For Adam was formed first, then Eve. 14And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner. 15But women will be saved through childbearing—if they continue love and holiness with propriety.
I'm not sure why I've stopped at the passage below. Perhaps because I'm a little sleepy and need something strong to jog my mind and stir my heart. I'm not reading it from the perspective of a feminist, and I certainly am not using a patriarchal lense of understanding. But now that I've said that, God is my father. So what would be wrong with a patrairchal view? If it's a Godly view then it's right. I guess what I'm getting at is that I'm going to have to read some more about this scripture. In the meantime, I know that I'm not suppose to get in the way of the truth as a woman and as a follower of Christ. I'll gather more later and let it marinate for now.
1 Timothy 2:9-15
9I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, 10but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.
11A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. 12I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. 13For Adam was formed first, then Eve. 14And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner. 15But women will be saved through childbearing—if they continue love and holiness with propriety.
Saturday, January 3, 2009
GOOD MORNING!
FINALLY! I got up before Trent woke up and stayed up after feeding him! I didn't even get to bed when I wanted to last night! I guess I'm so excited because even though I'm 28 years old I still struggle with getting up as early as I'd like to in the mornings.
Today I get to do a few of my favorite things. I get to personally train a lady who desires to make major changes in her life and I get to teach ZUMBA! I miss teaching Zumba more through the week but I definitely see how I'm less burnt out teaching only once on Saturdays. If I begin to teach more often I'll have to think back to this time where I was dying to teach more and be grateful.
I think life is like that. If I had to get up early every day I'd be over it. But the fact that it was a decision I made and stuck with it makes me so happy. That's the joy in obedience I'm experiencing I suppose. So to avoid burnout in life, I should probably continue to be obedient in the little things God presents to me so that I can constantly experience a unique, refreshing joy that makes each day brand new!
“For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to say "No" to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age,” Titus 2:11-12
At church last Sunday Pastor Mark talked about the "present evil age" in Galations. I imagine that "evil" could be used to describe "present age" in this scripture as well. It is not easy to live a Godly life today. But as I'm learning things that are not easy, are most worth it. And the harder I work in the little things to achieve what is not easy, the more joy I experience. So if I live in God's grace, and learn little by little, to say "No" to ungodliness, the more joy I'll have in my heart and the more effective I'll be for bringing God glory.
AMEN and AMEN!
Today I get to do a few of my favorite things. I get to personally train a lady who desires to make major changes in her life and I get to teach ZUMBA! I miss teaching Zumba more through the week but I definitely see how I'm less burnt out teaching only once on Saturdays. If I begin to teach more often I'll have to think back to this time where I was dying to teach more and be grateful.
I think life is like that. If I had to get up early every day I'd be over it. But the fact that it was a decision I made and stuck with it makes me so happy. That's the joy in obedience I'm experiencing I suppose. So to avoid burnout in life, I should probably continue to be obedient in the little things God presents to me so that I can constantly experience a unique, refreshing joy that makes each day brand new!
“For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to say "No" to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age,” Titus 2:11-12
At church last Sunday Pastor Mark talked about the "present evil age" in Galations. I imagine that "evil" could be used to describe "present age" in this scripture as well. It is not easy to live a Godly life today. But as I'm learning things that are not easy, are most worth it. And the harder I work in the little things to achieve what is not easy, the more joy I experience. So if I live in God's grace, and learn little by little, to say "No" to ungodliness, the more joy I'll have in my heart and the more effective I'll be for bringing God glory.
AMEN and AMEN!
Friday, January 2, 2009
Still trying...
Seems like the more I determine in my mind that I want to do something the more opposition or resistence I face. Like getting up earlier than usual, for example. I really want to get up earlier and last night I was ready for bed at 9p but Trent was not. He typically gets sleepy and I can put him in bed right away with a little crying but last night he cried for 30 minutes! I finally went up to calm him down and tried a little of everything before I got him to sleep. Finally we both laid side by side on his floor as I read to him. He was calm enough to look at the pages and listen and then finally, flopped himself onto his tummy, found his thumb, and fell asleep. It was 9:45p by this time.
Back to bed only to find my husband is in a ton of pain. The steroids he's taking for his bum neck (i.e. displaced disc) were causing him to have a migrain headache. He moaned for hours. I massaged his neck and back, scratched his back, got him some ibuprofren (which I don't know if you're suppose to take with the pills he's taking). We tried everything...EVERYTHING!
Finally by 12:3Oa I was asleep. I'm not sure what time Brett finally was asleep but I couldn't wait any longer!
All this to say I had the best intentions of rising early to take care of things but I didn't get up until 9:ooa! I could feel bad about missing the mark and then be lazy in guilt all day long, but instead I think I'll give it to God and let him make the most of today and try to get to bed at a better time tonight!
Most things in life that are worth it take some hard work, time, and thought. It's great to have ideals about how I want things to be but the catch is making my actions throughout the day line up with those goals. It's amazing to me how often I look at my day only to find that my actions do not reflect the desires I have for me and my family.
One day at a time, through God's direction, I will keep trying and hopefully be refreshed at the end of my life to see how much growth I've experienced.
Back to bed only to find my husband is in a ton of pain. The steroids he's taking for his bum neck (i.e. displaced disc) were causing him to have a migrain headache. He moaned for hours. I massaged his neck and back, scratched his back, got him some ibuprofren (which I don't know if you're suppose to take with the pills he's taking). We tried everything...EVERYTHING!
Finally by 12:3Oa I was asleep. I'm not sure what time Brett finally was asleep but I couldn't wait any longer!
All this to say I had the best intentions of rising early to take care of things but I didn't get up until 9:ooa! I could feel bad about missing the mark and then be lazy in guilt all day long, but instead I think I'll give it to God and let him make the most of today and try to get to bed at a better time tonight!
Most things in life that are worth it take some hard work, time, and thought. It's great to have ideals about how I want things to be but the catch is making my actions throughout the day line up with those goals. It's amazing to me how often I look at my day only to find that my actions do not reflect the desires I have for me and my family.
One day at a time, through God's direction, I will keep trying and hopefully be refreshed at the end of my life to see how much growth I've experienced.
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