Still trying...

Seems like the more I determine in my mind that I want to do something the more opposition or resistence I face. Like getting up earlier than usual, for example. I really want to get up earlier and last night I was ready for bed at 9p but Trent was not. He typically gets sleepy and I can put him in bed right away with a little crying but last night he cried for 30 minutes! I finally went up to calm him down and tried a little of everything before I got him to sleep. Finally we both laid side by side on his floor as I read to him. He was calm enough to look at the pages and listen and then finally, flopped himself onto his tummy, found his thumb, and fell asleep. It was 9:45p by this time.

Back to bed only to find my husband is in a ton of pain. The steroids he's taking for his bum neck (i.e. displaced disc) were causing him to have a migrain headache. He moaned for hours. I massaged his neck and back, scratched his back, got him some ibuprofren (which I don't know if you're suppose to take with the pills he's taking). We tried everything...EVERYTHING!

Finally by 12:3Oa I was asleep. I'm not sure what time Brett finally was asleep but I couldn't wait any longer!

All this to say I had the best intentions of rising early to take care of things but I didn't get up until 9:ooa! I could feel bad about missing the mark and then be lazy in guilt all day long, but instead I think I'll give it to God and let him make the most of today and try to get to bed at a better time tonight!

Most things in life that are worth it take some hard work, time, and thought. It's great to have ideals about how I want things to be but the catch is making my actions throughout the day line up with those goals. It's amazing to me how often I look at my day only to find that my actions do not reflect the desires I have for me and my family.

One day at a time, through God's direction, I will keep trying and hopefully be refreshed at the end of my life to see how much growth I've experienced.